Warrior Energy Has a Limit

A Therapist's Camino and the Strength in Stopping

I came back from Spain at the weekend feeling flat. Not the flatness of exhaustion - the deflation that comes when you set out to do something and it doesn't unfold the way you planned.

The plan that didn't survive the road

The Camino Invierno is a 265 km pilgrimage route through Galicia. I was prepared - physically, practically, emotionally. I had a plan. What I hadn't prepared for was the relentless tarmac - kilometres of it, punishing the soles of my feet through walking boots that weren't built for asphalt.

By 100 km in, my feet were in a bad way. I tried pivoting and reducing the distance but eventually realised I needed to stop. I took a train to Ourense and spent two days in the thermal spa pools there, the warm mineral water doing what my feet and legs had been insisting on.

When warrior energy needs to be brought to heel

The warrior in me had been driving me forward. Push through. Endure. Finish what you started.

Warrior energy has its place - it helped me cover over 200 km and complete the final stage into Santiago. But it needed to be brought to heel before it became the thing that broke me.

That's something men often struggle with. We know how to push. We're less practised at stopping and calling it wisdom rather than failure.

What I wasn't looking for

Alongside the hard roads there was beauty I hadn't bargained for. Vineyards in the early morning. Pine forests, almond groves, the sound of streams and waterfalls. Villagers leaving out apples and bottles of water for pilgrims they'd never meet. Hostel hosts welcoming strangers with a warmth that didn't need explaining.

At every road marker I stopped, took a breath, and said it aloud - "Buen Camino." Followed by the older pilgrim greeting: "Ultreia." From the Latin ultra - beyond - and the interjection eia, a call to move. An encouragement to go forward.

Going forward

The Camino I walked wasn't the one I intended. But it gave me a clearer sense of what drives me and why - my values as a therapist working with men, my purpose as founder of Stand Tall Empower CIC, my commitment to the conversation around men's mental fitness.

Ultreia isn't about reaching the destination. It's the instruction to keep moving - even when the terrain is different to the one you planned for, even when you have to rest, even when the goal shifts beneath your feet.

If you're in the middle of a plan that's changed shape and you're wondering how to keep moving without pushing past what your body and mind are telling you, sometimes it helps to walk through it with someone who works with men in exactly those moments.

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